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Couples Therapy

  • Do you feel alone in your relationship? Not heard, or seen?

 

  • Have you lost the passion and bond you once had? Are you missing those days?
     

  • Has life taken you away from each other and you don’t know how to get back?

 

  • Do you both feel like you do not hear each other and rarely get what you need?

 

  • Are you often irritated with things that you used to overlook? Are you feeling like you are either nagging or letting important things go to keep the peace? Are you feeling or the other person is always disappointed?

 

  • It seems the loudest one is getting their way, and you just have to continue to suffer to be able to move on?

 

 

You started off seeing the best in each other, you began to build a life together knowing you had the same or similar visions. You tolerated a lot. Somewhere along the way, you lost each other. You feel alone in your relationship, not heard, and valued. You feel like the other person just doesn't understand your needs or really see you. You are often irritated at the little things now, there is less time for your compassion, more to be done each day. 

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Often times time goes on, we become mom, dad, employee, sibling, daughter, son, in laws and so many roles you are always balancing between. Our loves ones suffering, is our suffering; their happiness is our happiness but no one seems happy. You feel like you are giving your all, but it's never enough. You feel like you are constantly hurting each other, but don't know how else to be heard. 

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We can help you get back to the partnership you wanted. We can help you communicate and bond again. We can help you get back to the compassionate loves you once were. We all come into our relationships with our history, experiences, traumas, narratives of what we need and what we want in our lives. Sometimes life can take us away from this happiness that we saw in our present and future. 

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We can help you communicate, heal and be able to deal with challenges when they come. If you are wanting to heal from an affair, betrayal, addiction or just because time has created wounds and resentments, we can help you. You BOTH deserve to be happy! Let us help you navigate these layers so you can have the relationship you want and DESERVE!

 

We use Gottman trained Couples counseling techniques, and Emotionally focused system therapy for techniques that have proven over decades to be effective. We honor the history and needs each person brings to the relationship. We believe everyone's experience is valid and they have done what they needed to make it this far. ​

Let us help you get  back to the loving, fun & bonded couple you once were. You DESERVE happiness!

  • How does Couples Therapy work?
    The "couple" is the client. Sessions include everyone involved. Confidentiality is included for the couple as a whole, which means the therapist can not keep secrets from any parties involved. The sessions will be a safe place for each person to express their feelings and experience, with no judgement. Each person comes into relationships with history, experiences, attachment narratives and needs, and ways they feel loved and safe. The work is to be curious and learn these for each partner. We work to increase communication, and increase each partners trust and security in getting these needs met. The therapist can help communicate needs and perspectives to the other partner. We work in a holistic approach to look at the family system as a whole and work to unstick all of the aspects that are keeping you from feeling close to each other. The therpist does not take sides in conflict. The goal is to have each person heard and valued in their experiences.
  • Can Couples Therapy work with only one party attending?
    Sometimes only one partner wants to begin the work of healing and changing the stuck dynamics in the relationship. It is best if both partners are working through the process. With both partners present, more direct work can be done. However, that does not mean that work can not be done with only one partner. You are not alone. We can still help you heal and work through strategies to feeling better in your relationship. In this case, it would be individual therapy instead of couples therapy. This would mean the one partner is the client, and not the couple. Should the other partner decide to join the therapy process, a new dynamic would need to be discussed and agreed upon in the rules of confidentiality, or a referral therapist would be recommended for everyone to feel safe in the therapeutic process.
  • When is it time to seek Couples Therapy?
    Every realtionship has challenges. No one gets along all of the time. Couples therapy can be helpful if you: Feel stuck or frustrated in issues Have a hard time in your communication Need to find the connection, trust and bond again Healing and moving forward from affair, addiction or betrayal Any time can be a good time to begin couples therapy. For some, maintenance is key to happiness. For others there are specific concerns that can be addressed to get unstuck and move forward. Some couples require deeper, longer more systematic work to get them on the right track together. We work to meet the couple where they are and the goals they seek. Your goals and needs are important to us and we will work toward those goals.
  • Can we discuss sex & intimacy in therapy?
    Yes, sex and intimacy is an important part of a healthy relationship. When trust and security is present in a relationship, sex and intimacy should be part of that healthy balance. It can help reconnect from what life can take away. However sometimes stress, trauma, conflict and many other reasons can cause issues in the intimacy in a relationship. We will help you work on all aspects of your relationships, as they are all connected to the overall functioning and inner feelings of safety together. Some individuals are uncomfortable with discussing this personal information in therapy. Our therapists will honor your comfort levels and not push you to discuss topics that make you uncomfortable. The therapeutic room should be a safe, comfortable place for all parties,
  • Is Inner Self Healing Center LGBTQIA+ friendly?
    Of course! We believe love is love. We never judge any type of consensual love or affection. All are welcome regardless of gender, sexuality or amount of members in a relationship. If you want to work toward healing and happiness, we want to help you get there. We all our clients to be their best SELF, in what ever their truest form is.
  • Will Couples Therapy save our relationship?
    In couples therapy the goal is to understand the needs of each partner. When issues are peeled back, and both partners are working on the process together, it can increase the trust and fulfillment in a relationship. However, not every couple that goes into couples therapy stays together. Sometimes people decided that the relationship is not what will make them happy in the long run, or their important issues are too far apart. A couple that is willing to put in the work together is a good sign that there is love and motivation to make it work, and that is an important element of sucess in couples therapy. No one may know where the end of the journey will go, but you will know where you want to go by the end of the process.
  • Can we still do Couples Therapy if we are ending the relationship?
    Yes! Decoupling can be difficult. There is usually more healing that needs to be done. Often times there are logistics to figure out. We can help unpeel the layers of the hurt and pain so you can close the chapter and move on with closure. We can help navigate in the new co-parenting dynamic. Children can feel scared and anxious when the family system changes, therefore they need to be protected from any conflict that is occuring between the parents. We can help to navigate these conflicts and changes in a safe enviornment, and help you create the united, safe place the children deserve during this time.
  • Is Couples Therapy beneficial for co-parenting if we are ending our marriage?
    YES! When the family system is changing, children can feel a lot of anxiety and worry about how everything will change, and what these change will mean in their lives. By limitng conflict that the child is exposed to, it helps lessen the anxiety knowing their relationship with each parent will not change. Children feel loyal to each parent, even if they are dissapointed in their parents actions and behaviors, so they need a united front to feel safe. Bringing these conflicts and disagreements into the therapy room, helps protect your children from the affects. Ending a relationship can be very challenging and full of painful emotions. Let us be that safe place for you to process and hash out what you need and away from your children.
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